William Lee has written a great article on AARP discussing about the Chinese tradition of the extended family model and how Chinese Americans are following the nuclear model like most Americans. William believes the reason is that:

A) It allows more freedom.

B) It allows more individuality.

C) Is how most families are.

By going with the nuclear family model, there is definitely less hassle/”work”/being tied down. Ok, so that kind of sounds mean…your mom,dad,grandma,grandpa,etc. being a hassle. It’s understandable, however, if you think about how hectic things can get these days.

William felt this way as well. It wasn’t until he interviewed his mom and delved deeper into researching for a book he was writing, did he understood where his mom was coming from (his mom being an immigrant and follow Chinese traditions of filial piety). He started to appreciated his mom’s compassionate values in which she had followed when raising him.

So, is filial piety relevant among Chinese Americans? In my opinion, there’s probably a lot of Chinese Americans who take care of their parents…but I believe the majority of families follow the standard nuclear model. Another thing to ponder is, will it continue? As the new generations of Chinese Americans mature and have families, will they follow Chinese family traditions, or will they follow the typical Americans? I don’t want to discuss everything said in the article because it’s a great read, but I do want to say one more thing in the form of a quote from it:

Jackson Wong, an American-born attorney in his 50s who retired after striking it rich during the dot-com boom, bought a larger house so he could take care of his mother during her last years. Toward the end, when even his mother’s doctor advised placing her in an assisted care facility, Jackson, who is about as individualistic a curmudgeon as you will find, simply declared, “I’m Chinese. I’ll never put my mom away.”

…sorry and one more:

Perhaps all of us in America can tap into some of what is best in Chinese social philosophy.

Yes, perhaps we can grab America’s individuality/freedom and China’s respect for parents and elders. Maybe we can meld these two philosophies and form our own version of filial piety; Because if you think about it, is bringing your “parents into your family” the only way to take care of your family…to bring respect?

Check out William Lee’s full article here.

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