I get this one question a lot: Would you date out of race?
In all honesty, I find this question to be a bit silly. Not just the fact that why does it really matter if someone decides to date out of race, and why is it any of your business to begin with, but the main reason I find it silly is that I’m not all one race. I’m half Asian (Japanese/Korean) and half European (Scottish/Irish/Dutch) and a tiny bit Native American. This, in my opinion, should already say to everyone that no matter what I date it would be considered dating out of race.
Dating out of race really doesn’t bother me because well…I’m the product of an interracial marriage and I’m very open minded. I have had crushes on guys of many different races and if any of them had asked me out I would’ve gladly said yes. What I find quite boggling, is how I can be called a racist because I date someone that is part of my background. Yes, I have been called a racist by a white guy because he found out I was dating a Japanese guy. He said I was being racist for dating an Asian but not a white guy…which I could only come to the conclusion that he was jealous because I wasn’t dating him but someone else. But it’s not the first time I have been called a racist for not dating someone white, and I am dumbfounded as to why my preference of dating means I’m racist in any way. I have dated white guys and I have dated Asian guys. So to say I’m being racist is ridiculous because I have dated both. No one says anything if I’m dating a white guy, but the minute I’m linked to an Asian guy, I’m suddenly a racist. I would like some explanation on that, seriously. Who knew who I dated was a crime?
Right now, my boyfriend of over a year is Japanese and I am very happy in our relationship. I have received ridicule from people who say I should find someone not Asian, or someone not Japanese if he’s going to be Asian, and I still do not understand the way people think. Why should someone dictate who I can and can’t date? Well, they can’t, because they’re not my mother, and even I won’t let my own mother talk bad about my boyfriend.
Ignorance may be bliss, but to everyone else, the ignorant person is just that: Ignorant.
Last 5 posts in Issues, Observances
- Ching Chong Says the Chinaman - October 23rd, 2008
- BetterAsianMan.com: Breaking the Asian Male Stereotype - September 23rd, 2008
- Filial Piety Still Kept Among Chinese Americans? - July 24th, 2008
- Identity Issues: Not Knowing Your So-Called Native Tongue - July 22nd, 2008
- Math and Science Not the Choice for Asian-Americans? - June 10th, 2008
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March 23, 2008
I think the people who say you should date someone not Asian are racist, since dating outside of your race is almost inherently not racist, LOL!
Who cares about haters anyway, right?
March 23, 2008
No one likes a hater. lol!
I know, right? Dating outside your race isn’t being racist…quite the opposite in my opinion! These people sure know how to contradict themselves, don’t they? haha
March 23, 2008
Scott is Japanese, why do u have to be such a racist. good gosh tiff!
March 28, 2008
Here’s a bit in your post that I find interesting from a cultural stereotype point of view
‘I have had crushes on guys of many different races and if any of them had asked me out I would’ve gladly said yes.’
Why would you not ask somebody out yourself?
March 28, 2008
I’m pretty aggressive with dating and 99% of the time, I’ve been the one to ask first. And I got rejected almost every single time.
The reason I made that statement is not to say I never did any of the asking, but to state that if any guy I liked, despite race/ethnicity, had asked me out, I would’ve said yes. Please do not think that I think the guy should always be the first to pop the question; I believe that if the girl is interested enough and she’s willing to risk rejection, then she should ask.
My boyfriend asked me out first, though that same day I was pretty much going to confess I liked him lol He just happened to beat me to the punch. At least it would’ve worked out either way.
March 24, 2009
i love him